"Facing" the thousands of on lookers and discovering the new hope - The continued journey!

Adversity never goes away and we continue to face new challenges as we stroll through our lives.  In my story about "losing my face", I left off at the time I exited surgery with thousands of stitches in my face and my jaws wired!  Well.....here we go as we finish up this trial in life.  Actually, it continues to this day! Adversity and pain never truly go away.

I was in my hospital room and wanting feverishly to go home.  The trauma of the event made me long for being in a place of comfort.  My friend was visiting me and I explained how I wanted to go home.  I explained to him that if I could get up and go to the bathroom by myself, I could lobby to go home.  Like a 3 year old finally getting the "potty" adventure down.  He helped me to the bathroom door and I entered with such determination to accomplish this task that was once so simple.  After I finished my adventure, I needed to wash my hands.  What is above the sink?  You guessed it, a mirror.  I had not seen myself since the surgery and was about to come "face to face" with reality.  I remember leaning my hands over the sink without placing myself directly in front of the mirror. lol.  I did a quick head move into the mirror so as to not really see myself.  I did this several times and knew that my friend was probably waiting outside the door hoping I had not fallen in or something.  I decided to "suck it up" and look in the mirror.  I remember that moment to this day and the image that was before me.  A bruised and swollen disfigured face with thousands of stitches and bars peeking behind the ever so torn lips.  I quickly let out a loud "oh no!"  I cried inside for a few moments and then smiled.  I remember opening the door and my good friend in a very concerned tone asking if I was all right as he had heard my "gasping" Oh No!  I was able to saying to him that I was okay, but disappointed that it wasn't Halloween as I had a built in mask.  We laughed and the pain shot through my face as the stitches tore at the incisions.  Laughing was once so easy and now was a painful joy.  I did get to go home and then had to face the many on lookers who began to visit.  At first I felt like a "freak show" act at a carnival wishing I didn't have to face the on lookers.  I then realized that there was nothing I could do, but face them all with dignity and confidence!

The summer progressed and I had one re-constructive surgery and had to wait until December or January to have a surgery that would truly remold my face.  The dental work couldn't start until the fall and yet I had college starting in late August.  Because I could not have sun on my face, I had to wear hats everywhere and as much sun screen as possible.  I was missing teeth and others were chipped and dying.  School was about to start and I was about to enter a campus of 20 to 30 thousand students with classes that sat hundreds.  I had to go as my goal was to complete college.  I couldn't let this obstacle no matter how difficult stop me from completing my goal of a college education.  To me the costs were too high!  I went back to school looking like a "freak" with tons of ointment on my face and a huge cowboy hat.  My face still disfigured and my teeth in a shambles, on I trotted.  I remember my physics class.  I had no feeling in my lower lips and the right side was almost missing anyway.  I remember taking endless notes and listening so intently that when I looked down at my paper there was a pool of drool.  How embarrassing, had anyone seen?  Were they observing this drool dripping onto my paper as I knew nothing of its occurrence?  I don't want to bore you with endless rambling about "oh poor me", but wanted to give you a taste of what was occurring.  I had to make a choice and the choice meant sacrificing pride and moving toward that goal.  How many times have you lost sight of a goal because of a small obstacle?  How many times have you let others talk you out of continuing your journey toward your goal?  There were some who thought I should take a semester off, but I couldn't.  I couldn't let the adversity before me win!

The journey from this one quick accident continues to follow me. Over 20 years ago I underwent this adventure and this past fall I had to endure one of the worst surgeries yet (In my current opinion).  I had no choice and understood that this adversity that life dealt me will be with me until the end of time.  Will I let it get me down or will I persevere and enjoy this one life I have?  I choose to live life to the fullest and control my attitude.  You see, things are only as bad as we allow them to be.  My friends....simplify life and use your attitude as that one power you have to overcome all that lies before you.  I truly want to help you if you need some support.  Contact me via my website (www.thetajlgroup.com), via email at thetajlgroup@gmail.com or call in to my blogTalkradio show at (646)200-4737 Thursday nights at 9 pm Mountain Time!  I want to help you find your wonderful life adventure and share ways for you to simplify life and truly enjoy the journey!