Live Life Like a Documentary 03/27 by Mastering Lifes Simplicity | Relationships Podcasts

Live Life Like a Documentary 03/27 by Mastering Lifes Simplicity | Relationships Podcasts

From Two Face to New Face? Stage 1 - The Journey Begins

Adversity is always amongst us each and every day.  The level of adversity however is never constant.  We determine the level based on our reactions to situations that occur around us.  When we are in a state of feeling low or even physically ill, the smallest situation can cause us the greatest harm.  This helps establish the fact that we create our obstacles or issues in life.  What is your level of adversity?  How do you handle the challenges that you face?  How do you react when wronged?  Almost dropped?

In the last blog I asked the question, “Could it get worse?”   There I was getting carted into the emergency room and being cared for.  The emergency personnel and all who were helping me were amazing.  The hustle and bustle as I was being cared for was an incredible process to behold.  The team carted me to the x-ray room in order to check for any spinal, neck, or other damage.  I didn’t want to be paralyzed for sure.  As they were lifting me onto the x-ray table from the cart, the power went off!  With this unexpected power failure, they almost dropped me.  I began to laugh as much as I could.  I think I bewildered them at that moment.  My comment was, “Can it get any worse?”  Being dropped at that time may have been insult to injury or much worse.  Oh well, we can’t worry about what we can’t control.  Do you find yourself “almost being dropped” when in an interaction with another or in relationships?  Can’t worry about what you can’t control.  You need to change your attitude and accept the challenge.  Understand that worry will create an issue in your life that didn’t exist prior to that moment.  How you approach the situation will determine the outcome.  Had I become angered or stressed during that moment, I would have transferred that anger and stress on to those who were caring for me.  By allowing them to understand that I accepted the fact that “crap happens”, they were able to continue with their tasks in an appropriate manner.  I often find that when things don’t work out as expected, my approach can create an even “more wonderful” experience.  I chuckle when individuals get so upset because their order at a restaurant was “messed up”.  They become so upset that the beans were not cooked properly or that the food is slightly cold, that they then create an issue not only for themselves but also for those around them.  I have received more free food, new friendships and joy when I have approached a situation like this with a “that’s okay attitude” or “mistakes happen” or “It’s not that big a deal”.  Let’s continue with the story.

I went through a 5 plus hour reconstructive surgery and awoke with a great deal of discomfort and pain.  By the way, one’s body does not like swallowing so much blood.  Quite a violent reaction for sure!  More adversity!  I remember it fondly and just told myself that it would pass.  Having your mouth wired shut and thousands of stiches makes it quite difficult to say the least. It passed and things got better.  That is how adversity in life is.  The pain will pass, but know it may always still linger throughout life.  You have to choose your attitude as you approach change, challenges and more!  Adjust your thinking in order to get through the challenges you face.  You can’t always control the outcomes, but know that you can influence them.  We can’t truly change those around us, but we can influence their thinking by the way we approach our relationships and adversity around us.

I need to pause this blog at the moment and will finish in my next posting as we discuss how to face those around us.  With thousands looking at me, I was able to accomplish my goal!  You can too, if you understand how to maintain purpose.  Remember how you feel when you had some “green” in your teeth and didn’t find out until after the fact.  Now compound that a 1,000 times and understand how you can see how blessed you truly are even when in the face of adversity.  Until next time, love life and all it throws at you!

Join me on Thursday evening at 9 pm MST on www.blogtalkradio.com/jeffreylund  Would love to hear from you!

Losing some face created a wonderful life journey? Adversity in the face of change!

I thought I would share a story of adversity and how we can overcome obstacles through one simple process.  Adversity Quotient is a term that was created around the mid to late 1990’s.  The basic thought about Adversity Quotient is that it is your ability to deal with challenges and how you respond to change.  We should grow from the trials in life and not allow them to tear us down.  What struggles have you faced?  Have they deterred you from your purpose in life?  From your goals?

Here is my story.  I had just finished my second year of college at the University of Colorado.  Go BUFFS!  It was the Friday before Memorial Day and I was exercising before going to work that night.  I was also excited because on Memorial Day I was going to have my first official date with a beautiful, wonderful woman I had met during the semester.  I jumped on my touring bike and began my 8 mile ride before getting ready for work.  I was about 8 blocks from home and passing a middle school.  All of a sudden, the front wheel released and the front forks of the bike tore into the asphalt.  I had no time to react and found myself plunging face first into the asphalt.  All of this happened so fast just as change can occur in our lives.  There are times we have no time to prepare for change and find ourselves in a situation we never expected.  When was the last time this happened to you?

My face hits the asphalt and I find myself sliding and flipping down the street.  I somehow ended up on my feet and remember the intense burn on my face and seeing the holes in my wrist area of my arms.  I couldn’t really see out of my right eye.  My immediate thought was that I was going to have an immense scab on my face and would have to deal with that all summer.  I was thinking about how long it would take to heal and how my summer would be ruined with a giant scab on my face.  What about my date?  Have you ever had something hit you so suddenly that you begin to start “crying” about the inconvenience it is going to cause?  Could be worse, so don’t dwell on what it could be and focus on your inner you and strength.  The journey may change.

You know how you were always told not to touch the burner because it was hot and yet you wanted to touch it as a kid?  That was my next move in my journey with this sudden accident, this intense adversity.  I thought about touching the scab and seeing how bad it was going to be.  As I slowly touched my face, my fingers slid on my exposed skull and I found that the right side of my face was somehow missing.  It was mangled and teeth were spewing out of my mouth.  The blood began rushing so incredibly hard and fast that I didn’t know what to do!  I was about to scream and go running in a panic, but I remember what happened next.  I felt as though I was being touched on my right shoulder and heard a voice telling me that I was going to be okay.  I immediately felt calm and walked slowly over to the grass area next to the school as the voice instructed. I heard I was going to be all right and that everything would be okay.  I laid down in the grass face first feeling as state of peace and some teachers rushed to my aid.  Have you ever felt panic during a time of change or adversity?  How did you react?  What were your thoughts?  Did you gain composure?

I was laying there face first bleeding like none other.  The school nurse showed up and somehow I was able to speak a little and I asked how it looked.  She tried to muster up a way to make me feel better.  Her exact words were, “Your nose appears to be broken.”  At this time I knew it was bad and laughed a little.  I told a joke about a teacher who had a broken nose, “Great. Now I’m going to look like Mr…..” I knew some of the people there, but they didn't recognize me.  I told them who I was as best I could with both jaws being broken and blood choking my every word.  My sister showed up as they were able to get a hold of her.  She didn't recognize me and who would.  We never see beneath the skin of those we interact with!  Do you truly know the ones you love?  The ones you interact and work with?  Truly listen to them and care for them and find their inner beauty?  We fail to take time to truly experience the joy in the ones we love.

I had determined that I was going to be okay and accepted the challenge before me.   Panic and fear were not going to overcome me.  We have a choice in any situation that we face in life.  The simple solution is to determine our approach.  We can’t change what has occurred, but we can change the outcomes and the journey.  Your attitude and your ability to face adversity are determined by your approach.  Choose to move forward and know that you can make it.  My story continues and the challenges in the hospital and the following year I am going to continue in my next blog.  I want to share the journey in hopes that it will help you and others truly face your challenges in life and turn them into opportunities. We tend to over-complicate our lives and approaches to adversities in our lives.  Everything in life works out!  Good comes from bad in our lives!  I could have created a crisis or issue in my life, but I chose not to.  We create our issues in our life and therefore are the solution.  Please share this with as many individuals as you can.  I want to continue the journey with thousands of you and share how you and those you love can create a wonderful life in how you face adversity!  What is your approach when faced with difficulty?  What is your level of courage?

Please stay tuned.  Please share your story with me! 

Next blog the story continues…..almost dropped and more!  Could it get worse?

Goals: Can you handle the adversity? 65 Yard Field Goal - $65K in Scholarships!

I had an amazing week last week in the San Luis Valley speaking with high school students about goal setting and careers. I was so inspired by these individuals and their abilities to achieve great things!  I made a public statement that a new goal I have is to kick a 65 yard field goal at a college football game next fall and give a $1000 per yard away in scholarships to some of the students in attendance. Well, accountability would state that if you say it then you have to do it.  So....I am waking up around 5:30 to 5:45 am each day and working out to include weight training and any aerobic exercise I can muster up.  I have cleared the snow in a portion of my front yard in order to practice kicking.  The net goes up and the footballs get kicked!  Thanks to snow blowers I was able to easily clear a portion of my yard!

I noticed my neighbor looking out the window attempting to figure out what I was doing.  To the occasional individual driving by surely is created some sense of curiosity.  You see when we set a goal that seems impossible not only to others but to ourselves as well, we need to know our Adversity Quotient.  The students in the San Luis Valley know what Adversity Quotient is.  Adversity Quotient basically states your ability to handle challenges and change.  Think about how you handle challenges.  Do you find yourself getting "flustered" easily by the smallest of challenges or change?  If so, your quotient is in the low range. Note that you can change your level through your approach.  Begin to change your outlook and visualize the positive in all you do.  Positive in means positive out.  We are the creators of our issues and therefore the creators of doubt.  We can't allow doubt and fear to seep in, we must maintain courage. So, back to the discussion about goals.  Obstacles are always going to make their way into our path.  How we handle them will help determine the outcome.  There is a great amount of snow on the ground and the weather is cold.  I removed the snow and dressed warm.  These obstacles were there, but not going to deter me from my goal. What about those who are questioning my actions? What about those who say I'm too old and that I have no prior experience?  I can't allow those ideals to overcome my mind and way of thinking. I have purpose!  In order to truly accomplish a goal, we must seek the underlying purpose to it.  To just kick a 65 yard field goal is one thing, but to kick it to help others in their quest is another.  The true purpose behind my goal is to show myself and others that I can accomplish something and at the same time help many students financially with their goal to get a college education. When we develop the purpose behind our goals, we develop a strong reason to continue in the face of adversity.  I may or I may not make the 65 yard field goal, but either way I am creating action.  What if I only kick a 35 yard field goal and give away only $35,000? I am getting in shape physically as this is a personal benefit!  I have at least created something that did not exist prior.  Oh, another obstacle is the money.  I still have no idea how I am going to find or create the funds to pull this off.  And, is there any college that will even allow me to kick during their game next fall?  CU? You see, when we create action in our goals we create possibilities.  We can't just sit around wishing or dreaming it, we need to create actions in order to create reactions.  Just the journey alone may inspire others to seek goals they have long been putting off!  Others may be so inspired that they decide to give to the cause and generate action on their behalf to help in the goal we are moving towards.  We need to get up and do something!

Don't be consumed by the "I can't" "You can't" "That's crazy!" and other statements that you and others create.  Write your goal with "will" statements and that will help you create action.  I sat around talking about kicking the field goal, but I needed to create action!  So I did!  Will you create actions in your lives to reach those outcomes you desire?  How do your goals assist others in their lives?   We all  need to take action and find meaning behind our action.  Trust in your abilities and know that all things happen for a reason.  Even if you fail, you create an opportunity to learn and grow.  From all things in life comes good as long as we create action and do not become overwhelmed by the adversities that show up in our paths.  I would love your support in this goal and would love to support you in your endeavors!  Contact me today and lets take on life's journeys together!

Set up the net (the plan), place the ball (the goal) and kick (action)!

Adversity is only as difficult as you allow it to be!

There has been a term around since 1997 coined "Adversity Quotient".  This basically states our capacity to deal with adversities or how we respond to challenges.  We all handle change and challenges differently as we process the information at different levels.  What is your level of adversity?  How do you respond to challenges that face you?  Have you ever observed a situation where an issue hits several individuals at the same time?  What happens?  Some of the individuals begin to panic, others get stressed to some degree and yet others take an "I can do" attitude.  But weren't they all hit with the same issue?

We determine the degree of difficulty in our issues we face based on our approach.  We either can allow the issue to consume us or we can accept the issue and consume it.  Let me give you an example:  I was 20 years old and had just finished the Spring semester at college.  I was out riding my bike on an 8 mile trek prior to going to work on the Friday before Memorial Day Weekend.  I was about 8 blocks from home when a major issue occurred  in my life.  The front wheel of my bike released and I immediately found myself sliding down the street on my face and then flipping a few times.  I stood up thinking I was going to have a huge burn on my face.  I couldn't see out my right eye, but decided to lightly touch my face.  I found that my hands immediately slid on my skull and that teeth and flesh were not where they were supposed to be.  The blood began to flow intensely. I was about to panic when a voice told me I was okay and to lay down face first in the grass.  I was immediately cared for.  I began attempting to tell jokes to those at my aid.  Lets fast forward to the hospital.  As they were moving me from the "cart" to the x-ray table, the power went out and they almost dropped me.  I began laughing as much as I could.  My thoughts looked at the humor of what was going to happen next.  I had no choice as the accident had occurred and I couldn't change that, but I could change the future outcomes.  The next day I walked into the bathroom.  As I was going to wash my hands, I was going to see myself for the first time.  I had thousands of stitches in my face and inside my mouth.  I had my jaws wired and was in intense pain.  I slowly began to move my face toward the mirror so that I could see the end result.  I remember that moment distinctly as I was about to see what I had been dealt.  When I first saw the image, I couldn't believe it and had to decide how I was going to handle it.  What could I do?  Could I change anything?  What was my level of adversity?  I exited the bathroom with my friend waiting to help me back to the hospital bed.  He looked at me with a face of deep concern.  I sighed and with a tone of disappointment I said, "I wish it was October and Halloween.  I have the perfect mask!"  We both laughed or I laughed as much as I could without ripping the stitches.  That was it.  I had to move forward.  The next year found me facing more and more challenges because of this one bike ride.  To this day I still have issues, but know that I have a life and a story to share in order to help others.

You see.  We all face challenges and issues throughout our lives.  No matter how big or how small, it is our approach that will get us through it.  We need to take on the challenge knowing that we will use our experience someday to help another.  When I hear someone say, "Things happen for a reason", I know it is true.  We may never lose the pain or the continued challenges because of a situation, but we must learn to continue to move forward.  We can't change what has happened, so why worry about yesterday.  We can only change tomorrow through our actions today, so why worry about tomorrow.  You see, I could have become depressed and created a life of depression because of that one split second in my life.  I chose, just as you should choose, to find a way to continue my life with confidence and knowing that I will make a difference in someone else's life.  Please look at your ability to handle the challenges you face in life.  You have a choice.  What level is your adversity quotient?  Will you find the good that comes from everything we face in life?  Will you work through the hurt and find the reason? Or, will you quit, become addicted to some drug and self medicate, or make excuses?  Choose life and look at the challenges to help you grow and become a beacon for others in this life.

I want to hear your story, share your pain and help you overcome your obstacles and turn them into opportunities.  Go to my website at www.thetajlgroup.com and contact me today!  Choose to live!

How to make a "New Year's Resolution" a reality!

Only 8 to 12% of us actually are successful with our New Year's Resolutions.  I want to share with you how you can make your 2014 New Year's Resolutions a reality.  We need to keep things simple and enjoy the process. 

There are six simple steps in achieving success with your resolution.

1.  "Change the Name" - Move away from calling your 2014 goal a "resolution".  Make it a name that is unique for you.  The name should help motivate you to move forward with your goal.  You may want to call it your Amazing Adventure, your Cause, your New Life Adventure  .....whatever motivates you.  Creating a "resolution" utilizing the word "resolution" can possibly set you up for failure.  With having not accomplished your "resolutions" in prior years, you may subconsciously associate "resolution" with lack of success.  Make your resolution fun and personalize it! 

2. "Define your Ultimate Purpose" - You need to look deep into the "why" you have set the "resolution" in the first place.  As an example; wanting to lose weight isn't defined enough for you to actually accomplish it.  You will need to seek the reason you are wanting to lose the weight.  Defining the deeper purpose will help increase and define your accountability.  You should also ask yourself, "Does this make sense?"  Is this really a "resolution" you should be seeking?  Make sure it is attainable, isn't going to harm you, is necessary, and helps promote your life fulfillment.  Take some time to develop your "resolution"  and don't rush into it.

3.  "There is always a Cost" - Nothing in life is for free. There is always a cost associated with everything we do.  In business there is a term called "opportunity cost".  Opportunity cost simply means; "What you are willing to give up today for something tomorrow - or - What you are willing to give up tomorrow for something today."  Using the weight loss "resolution", are you willing to give up that donut today for the weight loss tomorrow?  Whatever adventure you decide to take on for the New Year, try to find out what the costs are going to be.  If you understand that there are going to be some sacrifices ahead of time, you will be prepared to handle them as they come.  Go back and remember your ultimate purpose in order help you get through those sacrifices.

4.  "Plan it Out" - Take a few minutes to map out your adventure, your "resolution".  Keep it simple and lay out some milestones.  Don't create a complicated plan, just set some deadlines that help you accomplish small steps as you travel through your "resolution".  Create some celebrations that you can utilize along the way as you reach those milestones.  Understand that you must reinforce your successes and not dwell on your set backs.  Focus on what is working and make adjustments along the way to ensure that you stay on your path to success.

5.  "Be Flexible" - Learn to "Champion Change" and be prepared to alter your original resolution".  Know that you can turn your obstacles into opportunities if you create a mind set that is accepting of change.  Be the change and seek the change.  Feedback is essential in achieving what you are attempting to accomplish.  Seek feedback from those around you and listen to yourself.  What is your body telling you?  How are your emotions?  Make adjustments in order to obtain that "resolution".  What is working today may not work tomorrow.  Lose your stubbornness and be open to altering your plan.

6.  "Try, Try Again" - If it isn't working, don't give up.  You can't just wish it or pray it, you have to create action.  Your action will lead to your success, not your "daydreams."  Don't let December 2014 arrive and you haven't made any progress on your "resolution".  If you are failing, go back and redefine your purpose. Reevaluate your plan and make the changes necessary to reach your "resolution". Your success will be determined by your determination and resolve.  Keep going as you never know when you are going to break through and reach the stars!

Whatever you do, keep it simple.   Try setting a small "resolution" and after you accomplish it, then set another.  Don't just make the start of the "New Year" a time to set life goals, use the entire year to reach those dreams.  Enjoy this one life you have and don't stress over what you don't have or what you want.  Try my "5 Simple Steps to Happier Daily Living" challenge and be thankful each day for what you have.  Happy New Year from me and "Nagano".  We hope your dreams come true.

Please visit the Support page on this blog or my website at www.thetajlgroup.com today if you would like some support reaching your 2014 "Resolution".  Contact me today and take advantage of my web offer "Resolution 2014 Development" for $75  Only $49.99!  Mention this blog when contacting me and receive the full discount!  Happy New Year!

Post Christmas depression or relief? December 26th and beyond.

The hype! The build up!  The event! And.....  it is still only a 24 hour day.  The expectations and excitement of the big event - Christmas - can seem like a let down the day after.  Many go back to work the next day, have the joy of cleaning up, or returning gifts.   Then there is the fact you may have spent hours or even days decorating for this event only to see that you now have to put it away.  Depression or relief?  For this one event of the year many of us put in so much energy that it literally wears us out!  The big question for you is, "What Now?" 

We build up so much energy into the holiday, that we may experience a huge let down.  We changed our rhythm in life and set ourselves on a pace of pure excitement and expectations.  Maybe we had family reunions with members of our family we haven't seen for a long time.  The joy of seeing each other and spending time was so wonderful or overwhelming.  It may have been more than we expected and now that it is over, and we find ourselves feeling empty.  Or...maybe it was such a pain that we find ourselves truly relieved it is over.  What about work and career?  Were you one who worked Christmas Eve and are back the day after Christmas?  Was it a joyful day off or an interruption in your work process?  The morning after as you are having to go back to work can feel quite depressing as you leave and most others you know are still sleeping.  You may be asking, "Why me?"  Or...you might be relieved to be heading back to work.  What about the poor Burger King employees working the drive-up all night Christmas Eve and Christmas Day?  How was their holiday?  To be honest, there are many who do not celebrate the holiday at all.  For those of you who do celebrate, how happy are you that the event has come to an end so that you can get back into your daily routines?  We are all different in our approach to life.  But, "What Now?"  How do you handle the amount of change that has occurred over the past month or so?  Think about this; some radio stations start playing Christmas music the day after Thanksgiving non-stop through Christmas.  At midnight on the 25th as we move to the 26th, the Christmas music stops.  The next morning as you turn on the radio station, there is no more Christmas music.  You were conditioned to hear this music constantly for over a month and then "bam" it is gone.  What does that do to you? Are you having Christmas music withdrawals?  It often feels as though we are being controlled by the media, the retailers, expectations, and other outside sources.  "What Now?"

You need to take some time to "come down" from the holiday rush.  Take a few moments to reflect on the wonderful times you experienced as you prepared and celebrated the holidays.  Don't focus on the "low" point of the season, but on the "high" points.   You might want to journal those special moments you experienced.  Take time to celebrate that you were able to break up your daily routine for a short time and experience life on a different path.  Do not immediately attempt to get back into your routine.  If you are back at work the next day, find ways to take short breaks and reflect on the restful moments you had during the holiday.   Approach your work day as a "game" and not a chore.  Oh, with the Christmas music midnight shut off, you may want to play Christmas music periodically throughout your day. This may help you with the transition.  Do yourself a favor and take a positive approach to the day.  Utilize my 5 Simple Steps to Happier Daily Living (Be Thankful, Scream "This is going to be the greatest day of my life!", Visualize, Compliment and Breathe - get your full free copy at www.thetajlgroup.com)  You may want to plan out moments during the year that you can bring a little "Christmas" back.  Find fun little ways to surprise those around you and yourself with a little "Christmas magic".  It may help you to create a little plan for next year's celebration now that has you doing things throughout the year.  This could help you make this holiday event a more common piece of your daily living.  You might want to re-read some of the cards you received or re-connect those you were in contact with during the season.  Find what works for you as we all have unique ways of coping with change and "let down".  For those of you who are truly relieved it is over, celebrate!  But wait, "What Now?"  

More stress and expectations?  We have to get ready for another celebration?  New Year's Resolutions?  Now we are being hit with preparing for New Years Eve and New Years Day parties!  We need to get that perfect champagne, the right decorations, find the right party, get the food ready for New Years Day and more.  More expectations, change and excitement! My favorite is when we are lead to believe that we can change with the perfect New Year's Resolution.  There was an article in Forbes.com this past year that stated that only 8% of us are successful with our New Year's resolutions.  In 2007 there was a study done that showed that 88% fail in our New Year's resolutions.  With that being said, what is your New Year's resolution?  What is your "What Now?" if you can't be successful in your New Year's resolutions?  Just relax and believe that you will be successful in what you wish to achieve.  I will write about the movement into the New Year in a few days.  For now, just take a simple approach to the "change"-the New Year.  Set no expectations, wake each day expecting each to be the best ever, and remember that things always work out.  Smile, laugh and just lighten up as we move closer to January 1, 2014.  If you are struggling with the change and transitions, please contact me via my website at www.thetajlgroup.com.  I would love to help you.